For lawyers, consultants and mediators

How to lead conversations successfully - even difficult ones

With an online systemic structural constellation by Alexandre Urbach

Particularly in emotional situations, conversations often come to a dead end. They reach a stalemate, and finding a solution seems impossible. At this particular moment, a systemic online structural constellation helps you arrive at the necessary clarity to satisfy everyone involved and find favourable solutions.

Alexandre Urbach’s methods helped a lot in my work as a lawyer, especially in negotiations where the situation had reached an impasse. Through the online structural constellation, the parties were able to see other points of view. They were able to engage more with the other party and make compromises that both sides benefited from in the end.

When conversations escalate, everyone suffers.

Things get loud. Insults and threats are often exchanged. Old fights are rehashed and held against the other person. You end up at a stalemate where neither party is willing to let go of their point of view. In the worst-case scenario, participants abandon the conversation altogether and walk away without coming to a resolution.

That means you have lost control of the situation. An agreement seems unlikely, and in the end, all parties feel wronged.

It is not the direction the discussions should go under your leadership. But how do you take charge in such difficult situations? The key: finding common ground. 

Why is it challenging to de-escalate a volatile conversation?

It’s easier said than done. In a stalemate, parties will rarely stray from their point of view. The problem: the conversation is too emotionally charged. Distance is required to see the bigger picture. As a result, those involved seldom even notice that they are also affected by the conflict themselves.

That is the pivotal moment to take a step back and look at the problem from another point of view. A systemic online structural constellation can help you achieve that. Finding common ground – with a systemic online structural constellation. 

Visualize the cause - with a systemic online structural constellation

In a systemic online structural constellation, the conflicts within your company are re-enacted with figures on a “system board”. 

We use the people involved and the situations into account but also include abstract elements such as goals, obstacles, or ideas. With this method, the conflict can be symbolically re-enacted as effectively as possible. 

The participants then take on the roles of the individual figures and position themselves on the system board. 


It gives everyone an overview of the conflict.

It enables participants to gradually work out what has triggered the conflict in your company – and find possible solutions together. 

The manager can then use these insights to prevent new conflicts in the long term.

How collaboration works


Performance Booster and Strategy Meeting

What are the current problems in your company and how have you already tried to resolve them? You will answer questions in the Performance Booster. It allows me to create a picture of the situation and evaluate if a systemic constellation would work for you. I will also be happy to show you how a constellation works.


Systemic Constellations

If it’s a match, we will arrange an appointment for a constellation session with all the participants. The sessions are online. In about 1.5 to 2 hours, we uncover the causes of conflicts and work out solutions.


The Follow-Up

A few days after the session, I will follow up to assess whether a strategy was implemented and if there was a resolution for the conflicts. If necessary, we will arrange a second session.

What is the Performance Booster?

The Performance Booster is a personalised questionnaire I create specific to your needs. It helps me better understand the situation in your company. It allows us to explore whether a systemic constellation makes sense for you. Simply fill out the contact form. I will contact you and send you your Performance Booster – free of charge.

About me

Hello, I am Alexandre Urbach. Through my experience in various management positions over many years, I often noticed that when people reach an impasse, clarity is needed to resolve the problem. However, over the years I observed that clarity can be a path most people struggle to find.

It is where the systemic structural constellation comes in. It shines a light on areas of conflict and supports your team in finding practical solutions to the situation.


For more than ten years, I have supported and guided people in discovering what causes conflict – and resolving disputes. 

My mission: to resolve conflicts and bring people back together. 


The size of the company itself does not matter. What is important is the size of the group or elements involved. A constellation can be performed with 3 participants/elements or also with 6 to 8 participants/elements. It is recommended to limit the conflict to as few persons or elements as possible. Experience has shown that this is how to achieve the best results.

The cost depends on the duration, the size of the group, and the number of sessions required. Please contact me for a commitment-free quote.

In a systemic online structural constellation, the conflicts within your company are re-enacted with figures on a “system board”. The participants then take on the roles of the individual figures and position themselves on the system board. 

It gives everyone an overview of the situation which allows you to look at the problem from different angles, see it from the perspectives of others, and test changes in the system by altering the structure.

Step by step we find the trigger for the conflicts in your company – and find possible solutions together.

Depending on the problem and the circumstances, the constellation takes about 1.5 to 2 hours. Experience has shown that it is better to keep the sessions as short as possible to achieve the best results. It is better to follow up with another short session a few days later if required.

All sessions take place online. Online makes it easy for all parties to take part in the appointment. Personal concerns, including “family constellations”, can also be discussed and resolved in online structural constellations.